They found him dead a week back, in his fathers new house. He was 22, he had final year engineering and had secured admission in Germany for an advanced course. His parents had separated an year back and his mother lived in a different city with his brother, and her parents. He was happy the night before, and cooked his dad his favorite meal. They had chatted about life in Germany where he was looking forward to go.
It all started six years back, when his little brother was only 5. His parents would fight a lot, over small things, like who will drop the younger one to school, who will make breakfast, who will get the groceries etc. He could think of times when home was a happy place to come back to. When his father would play with him and his brother, while his mom sang in the living room. He dint remember the last time he had seen her smile, or sing. She was living in a different city now, along with the little one. He had left home when he started his engineering. Leaving the town, the house, dad, cousins everyone behind, to a new city over 100 km away. This was when things had gone from bad to worse. Instead of working out their differences, his parents had decided that their parental duty was now over, and they could move on. They filed for a divorce the week he landed in college and started his classes.
He got to know when he was in first trimester of mechanical engineering. Among strangers and rigorous academic schedule, he was often clocking 16 to 19 hour work days, leaving him no time to think, or share his feelings. It was then that he noticed her, a long dark haired girl with sharp features, confident and smart, social and outgoing. He was infatuated by her exuberance. She was attracted by his aloofness. When she wore the sexy LBD for college freshers party, he was the only guy who dint stare at her and made her feel safe around him. They often worked together for assignments late into nights, exchanged notes and exam tips. She had a different group of friends to hang out with who were more popular, more social like her. He was in college, he had friends, but people hardly noticed him. He was like a part of the classroom furniture whom no one noticed. Meanwhile, they talked, but dint actually become friends till much later. His heart was a riot of emotions whenever he saw her, but by the time she would realise her feelings for him, it would be too late, and he would have left for a place so far, her feelings wouldnt reach him. The first time she noticed him was two years later, at a common friends birthday party. He dint know she was among the people present there. He loved to sing and he sang his hear out, belting out one melody after the other, as she looked on mesmerised by the depth of his voice, his fingers strumming the guitar strings, like a ballerina dancing a practiced routine. Later when they sat alone on a moon light terrace, they chatted about the most insignificant little things. This was the happiest night in his life. He had recieved the news of his parents divorce coming through the next day. He dint go to college for a week. She would wait for him every day after classes, but even when he returned, his mind was elsewhere and he was distracted.
During the following summer, he went to his mothers new place. His brother was excited to see him, and his grandparents werent. For some reason, his Nana and Nani had never liked him much. His mother appeared aloof, but happy with her new life. He somehow felt unwelcome at the new place, and this feeling would not leave him when he left for college after the two week vacation.
In his gut he knew something was different. He had never scene any images of his birth, or as an infant. Their earliest family pics showed him atleast 2 year old. Sometimes, in his dreams, he could fainlty remember a house in the hills, a farm, and a woman whose face he couldnt recollect. But his city dint have any hills, and no one in his close family had been a farmer.
Back in college, in the final year of engineering, the pace of studies picked up, leaving him with no time to think again. Life was all about projects, placement tests, classes, exams, and also occasional music gigs with the college band. He had forced himself to get over his infatuation with her, because he belonged to a broken home, and there is no way he could have a successful relationship. The last thing he wanted now was leave college without a job or an offer from a reputed foreign university, because the alternative would be being a burden on his father or mother, something which wasnt an option right now.
He committed suicide three months later.
It all started six years back, when his little brother was only 5. His parents would fight a lot, over small things, like who will drop the younger one to school, who will make breakfast, who will get the groceries etc. He could think of times when home was a happy place to come back to. When his father would play with him and his brother, while his mom sang in the living room. He dint remember the last time he had seen her smile, or sing. She was living in a different city now, along with the little one. He had left home when he started his engineering. Leaving the town, the house, dad, cousins everyone behind, to a new city over 100 km away. This was when things had gone from bad to worse. Instead of working out their differences, his parents had decided that their parental duty was now over, and they could move on. They filed for a divorce the week he landed in college and started his classes.
He got to know when he was in first trimester of mechanical engineering. Among strangers and rigorous academic schedule, he was often clocking 16 to 19 hour work days, leaving him no time to think, or share his feelings. It was then that he noticed her, a long dark haired girl with sharp features, confident and smart, social and outgoing. He was infatuated by her exuberance. She was attracted by his aloofness. When she wore the sexy LBD for college freshers party, he was the only guy who dint stare at her and made her feel safe around him. They often worked together for assignments late into nights, exchanged notes and exam tips. She had a different group of friends to hang out with who were more popular, more social like her. He was in college, he had friends, but people hardly noticed him. He was like a part of the classroom furniture whom no one noticed. Meanwhile, they talked, but dint actually become friends till much later. His heart was a riot of emotions whenever he saw her, but by the time she would realise her feelings for him, it would be too late, and he would have left for a place so far, her feelings wouldnt reach him. The first time she noticed him was two years later, at a common friends birthday party. He dint know she was among the people present there. He loved to sing and he sang his hear out, belting out one melody after the other, as she looked on mesmerised by the depth of his voice, his fingers strumming the guitar strings, like a ballerina dancing a practiced routine. Later when they sat alone on a moon light terrace, they chatted about the most insignificant little things. This was the happiest night in his life. He had recieved the news of his parents divorce coming through the next day. He dint go to college for a week. She would wait for him every day after classes, but even when he returned, his mind was elsewhere and he was distracted.
During the following summer, he went to his mothers new place. His brother was excited to see him, and his grandparents werent. For some reason, his Nana and Nani had never liked him much. His mother appeared aloof, but happy with her new life. He somehow felt unwelcome at the new place, and this feeling would not leave him when he left for college after the two week vacation.
In his gut he knew something was different. He had never scene any images of his birth, or as an infant. Their earliest family pics showed him atleast 2 year old. Sometimes, in his dreams, he could fainlty remember a house in the hills, a farm, and a woman whose face he couldnt recollect. But his city dint have any hills, and no one in his close family had been a farmer.
Back in college, in the final year of engineering, the pace of studies picked up, leaving him with no time to think again. Life was all about projects, placement tests, classes, exams, and also occasional music gigs with the college band. He had forced himself to get over his infatuation with her, because he belonged to a broken home, and there is no way he could have a successful relationship. The last thing he wanted now was leave college without a job or an offer from a reputed foreign university, because the alternative would be being a burden on his father or mother, something which wasnt an option right now.
He committed suicide three months later.
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